goddamn it. I am tired of living in a 50 year old lady’s flat and getting by on $400 a month. It could be much much much worse though. An interview with a school in Oklahoma city tomorrow. Hm . . .

I’m always leaving and can’t remember what I left. I sometimes wish I took a different road. But this is the road I am currently on. So be it. I am finishing the manuscript I wrote in Korea called Wonderland. I re-looked at it today and found a way back into a manuscript. I can’t…

13:59 Katowice Train Station Rivers of piss collect at cafes. Watch where you walk. I eat what locals eat but refuse to tie my shoelaces. Tired smile with auburn beard. Pre-Gothic Post-Celtic wanderlust. Fur coated ladies strut past frozen men in sleeping bags reaching out for a light. A kiss for some short love. There’s…

Don’t know that money is so evil when you don’t have it. Once you have too much of it it might get a tad evil. How about two more abstractions: money and freedom. Too much money and you’re bound to lose some freedom. But not enough money and you’ve lost as well. Money ain’t evil.…

15:44 In Poland they call unfiltered coffee Turkish. I don’t know how long this has been going on. My clothes are drying on a white rack by my window in Block 7A. I’m in a small cramped room in New Europe. A concrete grave in a maze of flats. These flats are my patrons. I’ve…

Havel gave some good speeches near this spot to the good citizens of Prague. This is the site of revolution. Re volition.

nice wee town in Bohemia

A Russian race car driver’s grave in Bohemia

so I have a nice wee hernia. I went to the Polish emergency room last night. It’s a bit painful but not terrible. I need a small operation next week. Trying to figure out if the British government can cover it since I don’t have Polish health insurance. My boss has me working under the…

This is a church in Sedlec (a little village outside Prague). The story is a knight went to the holy land during the Crusades and returned with some holy dirt. He sprinkled it outside the church. It became prime real estate for the departed. Big gold coins if you want a place in the holy…

I am using my moleskin again and it feels good. I find it difficult to write when I can’t settle my mind about the future. I applied to a lot of independent schools in the U.S., but then I realized it is going to very difficult. Logistics wise it is hard to survive in America…

I have been listening to Chad Helder’s cd of queer horror. It is an amazing performance of poetry and short stories. The ambient sounds, flashes of insight, and unforgettable images make this cd a must for the brainpan. There is derelict energy here. Imagine Jack Kerouac reading queer horror with ambient music. It’s a purging.…

I can’t seem to shake the feeling I should have a solid career by now. I am heading into my 33rd year and just living from week to week in terms of money, savings etc. I fretted this all week and spent a lot of hours on the internet looking for secure jobs for a…

here are the pictures from my trip to Slovakia for Christmas: Poland Webpage

New website for Poland. Pics, video, audio, and a poetry podcast from my ms Godzeenie. Click Poland website link on the right. Also, a website with pics and vids from South Korea and Northern Ireland. Click South Korea and Ireland link on the right.

The poets in North Carolina are alive and busy. Energy abounds. Here is a great video of a reading at the Nightlight in Chapel Hill. Amy White did a great job with the editing. A really engaging video. Nightlight Reading

A very interesting poetry e-book and performance. Check out the queer horror album and the e-book at: Queer Horror I will report back with a mini review soon.

Only a few weeks till Christmas. Need to figure out how to get to the Slovak mountains. The mountains in Slovakia are supposed to be real nice. Going to the Tatras. Hope it is nice and icy.

can’t get any sleep. It’s a friday night (or early Sat morning) in Poland. A boring uneventful night. I am typing this at a friend’s house in Poland. I am typing in the dark. Thinking a lot lately. Maybe it’s time to take the voyage home. Problem is: I don’t know where that is anymore.…

So I ran out of Lamictin and Zoloft in Korea and some doctor (via two translators) put me on Prozac. Not a good reaction. Wrong drug. nearly packed it all in. So I stoped them altogether. I was on Lamictin and Zoloft for one year. Now I finally feel like I am climbing out of…

Zory is an old Polish town. Nice old streets. The people are very friendly. I found a really nice pub called Spinoza and it is perfect. Abstract murals on the walls. All brick inside with arches. Underground in the cellar. A really good feel. Just need to make a few friends to drink with. Still…

No more Katowice. I am in the small town of Zory. The 50 year old lady/landlord is super cool. A nice room. A shelf in the fridge for my food. There is another Polish lodger that works at the hospital. Both the other lodger and the landlady don’t speak any English. Only Polish and Russian.…

I didn’t realize how much I appreciate Thanksgiving. For a long time I disowned it because most of my relatives were in Ireland. But then I created some wonderful memories with my ex-wife Tiffany and her friend Missy. Now I am missing them terribly today. A rough week so far. No human contact for a…

it always sneeks up. Surreal again in another country where I don’t speak the language. Here are some recent poems from Godzeenie (always mutating/in-progress). 22:38 Godzeeniewon’t eat sins, can’t atonefor what you don’t have, labia majora, give us a rolling egg, intothe sun-clotted bladder, we’reall going to die, too latefor the shrunken urethra, ovemmedula, fuckedass…

Gonna keep this blog rolling. Keep the voices and lose my self. That’s what I want from art and life. To lose myself. To become less self-consciousness. To experience experience. I’m in Poland. Recently finished with Korea (but Korea will never be finished with me). I’m seeing parts of the world I never thought I…

My mind needs moving. Sometimes this includes moving my feet. I am floating in shit. Time to put on the goggles. FUCK THE PASSIONLESS LIFE! FUCK KATOWICE! FUCK BORING TEACHING ROUTINES! Full-tilt again. Mr. nice-guy gets flattened. I refuse to flatten!

Got a gig in Zory. Zory is a little town. I have free housing with a 50 year old Polish woman. But they assure me she is a young 50. I will have freedom to design and create. No more Callan for 32 hours a week. Two more weeks in the armpit of Poland.

The formating is way off. Much different poems in person. 12:20 (For Zofia) “The Bright tongue of the two / languages / dance in the one light” (Robert Duncan) I could summon cosmic gosip, unskin the monkey with its un- relenting eyes, it is never simple, these passages, these pro- miscious wanders with gravel in…

Candles galore in the graveyards

Callan works but so does McDonalds!!!

on the rebound. I’m reading between the lines. Back to the voices. Damn I missed the voices! No more self-indulgent thoughts of ending it. Back to my head against the wall! Fuck suicide!

I’ve got to remember why I am here. I mean, not on the earth. There’s no reason for that. It just is. But I am in Poland to write a manuscript. But I need a job that’s a little interesting to feed my writing. I return home almost always mentally drained every night. I mean,…

I’m finding an exit outta katowice. Two interviews on Friday. One in small town called Zory and one in Krakow. Hope I can make it to both interviews. Gonna be a crazy Friday but I gotta get outta this shitty city. And fuck Callan!!! So tired of teaching stage one. Where is my fucking mind????

The oven :-(

I got more pictures and much more recent versions of poems from Godzeenie. Just got to get internet in my flat and then I will post them. It helps to put them out in the world somewhere. Just imagining an audience (however small) helps me to revise.

I can’t stand Katowice. I went to Krakow this weekend and its the place for me. I sent out a few apps for schools and might have an interview in two weeks. Gotta get out of this very very ugly city. Keep steppin in dog shit. Gotta walk fast after work and look like I…

Just moved from Rybnik to Katowice. I have an amazing flat. The nicest place I have ever lived in any country. But no internet so I am typing this in a smelly train station. So I am back in a city. More to do. I’m also connected via rail to other cities in Poland and…

Heading to Czech Republic in a few minutes. Great little village on the border named Owsiszcze. Hanging with a real cool gal named Ela and her friends Aga and Iwona. Moving to Katowice tomorrow which is a medium sized city. Jazz club. Nice flat. My 4th flat in POLAND IN four weeks. Amazing. But I…

The paint is very wet on these. I’m always in progress. These poems will change and mutate no doubt. 15:53 Old horse with new bucket, Hermes in a real duel with Apollo, I’m gaining weight, strip the scales, got no bal-ance, immense rage & fleet on foot, I strap on my Zbigniew Herbert, let the…

I am starting to hit my stride with the new ms. It’s called Godzeenie. Thanks to the help of a nice Polish girl (and fellow artist) I discovered some interesting things about the word: Godzeenie is a play on the Polish ‘godzina’ which means hour. So the poems are titled according to the time when…

Finally moved into a new flat and got my very own internet connection. YIPPIE. A little slow but it works. Poland is fascinating. Lots to see. I am hoping to visit Krakow and Prague in the next few weeks. Meanwhile work is hectic, but I am in Poland so I’ll deal. I am waiting for…

made it to poland. so far it’s a tad hectic trying to learn the new teaching method after getting used to teaching uni. The method I am learning is called Callan. Not sure what I think about it yet. I don’t have internet access yet. Gotta use internet cafes. But I will move this weekend…

check out Wonderland for lots of new pics and videos from Ireland (Portadown, Giant’s Causeway, Ulster American Folk Park) as well as some poetry from a new manuscript Godzennie

It feels good to sleep in my cousin’s bed and eat an Ulster Fry and walk the footbridge into downtown portadown for a sausage supper with Chinese gravy videos will soon appear on the wonderland website under “ireland”

This is the correct address for Wonderland

I am flying to Dublin then getting picked up by my aunt and then I will be in my birth town. This is my last night in Seoul.But leaving is painful cause I got my close cousin and a girl I admire and love in Seoul. Wonderland will include a Poland and Ireland section. keep…

Sweatin like crazy but now I am showered and in my Korean nightshirt. It is purple with little cotton buttons. My dreamshirt. This is the first time I will wear it to bed. wearearbed hm . . . I am ready to admit my favourite vowel is . . . E my second favourite is…

Andrew, me, and Jonathon

Check out the summer cookout over at WONDERLAND

Been working out for the past two weeks. Three times a week. One hour cardio. 20 min of various crunches with weights etc. But here’s the strange thing: I gained 2 kilos. I’ve even been eating small meals. Sometimes just two sandwiches. One for lunch and one for dinner. Strange. Maybe it’s a bit of…

I lost a lot of my English for six months in Korea and tried to refind it via clear concise sentences. That was the beginning of my ms Wonderland. It was an interesting experiment. I had a difficult time reading novels and poetry with complex vocabulary. My day to day English was severely limited and…

I’ve added a recent video and some new entries from my ms Wonderland. It’s an interesting process thinking about matching poems with pictures. WONDERLAND

I am feeling restless and rough. The rain just won’t stop. I normally don’t mind a bit of misty rain. But this heavy rain is getting to me. It’s summer break but I am just staying inside writing and perhaps thinking too much. Feel like I need to get out of here. Somewhere else. But…

It won’t stop raining here in South Korea. Flooding etc. Heavy rain for almost seven days and nights. Non-stop. In other news irony is finding its way into Wonderland. Or maybe it’s a little wit. What is between irony and elegy? Some current reading projects: Walter Benjamin (Reflections) Jonathan Williams (selected poems) Tolstoy (Resurrection) Art…

Some serious rain in South Korea today. It is monsoon season I guess. I’m not in the mood to venture outdoors today for my usual Kim Bap for lunch. But I have some bread, peanut butter, and some cream cheese. So a cream cheese peanut butter toasty. I think I am gonna watch a BBC…

I’ve decided to keep this space and use it for off the cuff shit. talk. Get a bit personal etc. The Wonderland Blog will contain excerpts from my work in progress as well as pics, movies etc. Today I am feeling very lonely for my books. I thought I could give them up. But I…

THIS BLOG IS NOW RETIRED FOR A WHILE. I’VE DECIDED TO USE MY WONDERLAND WEBSITE AS MY NEW BLOG. PLEASE VISIT my WONDERLAND BLOG

a few poems from Wonderland at MIPOESIAS

June 12th 2006 Everything I care for happens All the timeThe old wood sticks out From the newer handleThe neighboring dust Will have its way June 11th 2006 That, we into the world, into the cowshit andGold painting the sky, that we, laid in-Mind, rolling over cat-Egories not likelyTo be adequate, we, thatBig round story,…

I WILL POST A VIDEO SOON OF A KOREAN BASEBALL GAME I ATTENDED WITH THE POET JIM GOAR. I WILL ALSO POST A VIDEO OF THE CHANGING OF THE GUARD AT THE OLD PALACE AT THE CENTER OF SEOUL. PLUS LOTS OF OTHER FUN STUFF IN THE FUTURE. CHECK IT OUT PERIODICALLY FOR UPDATES: VIDEOS…

Just got an email from my friend Chad Helder. He has a really interesting blog and website on Queer Horror. Check out his blog here: Chad Helder’s Queer Horror Flash Fiction and his website on Queer Horror here: Chad Helder’s Unspeakable Horror

Gestures and Greetings(Ssangmun, South Korea, May 30th 2006) “If a man has character he will have the same experience over and over again.”(Nietzsche) He’s completely wrong > I could veil myself in speculation because I’m such a pig-headed bastard > the answer is: “You don’t need talent to be a genius” > my head has…

I’M CREATING A WEBSITE FOR MY WONDERLAND PROJECT. IT WILL INCLUDE READINGS FROM MY POETRY MANUSCRIPT, PICTURES, AND SHORT MOVIES FROM KOREA AND OTHER ASIAN COUNTRIES. THIS IS THE ADDRESS: WONDERLAND

I just moved to north Seoul. it’s about an hour and a half commute to work. But it’s much cleaner than Gangnam. I live in Ssangmun. It is close to Dongdaemun. Dongdaemun has cheap clothes. last night I went to the Dongdaemun night market. None of the clothes fit me. It was frustrating. So I…

Seoul Station(May 5th 2006) Waiting for a bullet train I am heading to Pusan to see some Korean sea. It’s overcast, dirty, dusty, muggy. My shirt sticks to my body. It smells like shit and everyone is mumbling in staccato. Rush. Push. Bali bali. An old Korean lady (ajima) wanted money. When I refused she…

A few poems from my manuscript Buckshot will be featured in Unpleasant Event Schedule on May 14th. Check out Unpleasant Event Schedule for new poems every day!

Birthday(Gangnam, South Korea, April 6th 2006) What can I tell you about Korea?Got this new moleskin for my pocket and some square glasses with a red frameI sweat on the subway I SWeat on the bus I SWeat in the classroom I SWeat & I SWeat Got a package with new shirts and sweets from…

I am getting ready to start my commute this morning. It’s a tad exhausting but not in time. It only takes 45 min. 25 min in the subway and about 20 min on the bus. But it’s the traffic. The crowds. The sweaty bodies stacked against each other. The herky jerky bus with abrupt turns…

Well, time is strange as we all know. Ten years ago I got married to a wonderful woman and in two months I will be divorced. We are still good friends but it is difficult. I don’t know where I am headed. I don’t know if I will ever marry again. But I don’t plan…

Korea is going through some big changes. The women’s movement is just getting started and a lot of foreigners are pushing for civil rights. It hasn’t totally kicked into high gear yet (not quite the 60’s), but it might get there. Some university students are protesting against the Americanization of Korea and some of my…

Starbucks(Gangnam, South Korea, March 31st, 2006) I’ve never heard of a conscious monotypethe shower curtain illuminates a dead bodyI’ve a glittering exterior but a gloomy interiorthe days are shifting and I am unable to reach you this is not a grim joke spring is coming is coming is comingto Korea to Korea the dust from…

I had a really good birthday celebration last night in Hongdae with my cousin and some friends. I drank a little too many shots and I have quite the headache this morning. I didn’t get rip-roaring drunk. I just do the buzz these days. But mixing drinks does my head in. I have a Korean…

After Grog Bog (OSAKA, JAPAN MARCH 20TH, 2006) the bog after grog is runny Grog clears the tummy Grog grog grog Bog bog bog I’ve got a bog in my tummy & a grog in my throat Gog gog Og Og I’ve a runny gr . . . gr . . . Gr OG bOg…

I am leaving my goshiwon in 15 min for a new place in Gangnam. Goodbye to terrible tiolets! My new place is very clean and modern. I am sharing it with a Korean roommate who speaks very good English. It will take about an hour to travel to work everyday, but it’s worth it. Now…

This university gig is really rocking. I am meeting some fascinating professors and the students are really really good. Tomorrow I am going to a classical music concert with some of the faculty. It should be cool. Then I am going out to eat with the professor of art that hooked me up with this…

My actions cannot bear this out. Actions are abstract and abstractions cut me down to size. An abstract is a summary. I stand under an act. My guilt is a damp sock. Eden feeds on waste. Love feeds on love. This notebook keeps me sane. Stung with passion I am not enough. Throatchoked with all…

SLEPT　in　a　capsule．More　ｌａｔｅｒ． Ｊａｐａｎ　is　ｖｅｒｙ　ｃｌｅａｎ． 　乗れ　そおｎ

3-16-06 Family precepts strike me as vaguely correct. My name is a question. It does not answer where I come from. Also it lets me enter the chorus of absolutions. I do not know what will occur in my second childhood. I am in Korea as a newly shaven lamb but a lion grows within…

3-15-06 The owl ate my pussycat. A new form is just around the corner. I am typing on my powerbook with an open robe. I lie in shame before my father’s face. Hotcold I am always leaving somewhere. In shame I sit on some yellow swings. In shame I color my clothes with white paint.…

My lonliness keeps coming and going by the hour. Iron and Wine is either helping or prolonging the sadness. I am not really sure. I am having some very intense dreams. A big swirl of memories every hour or so. I miss the west quite a lot. I think I may go to Poland or…

I really feel alone right now. Lonely and sick of everything Korean. Not all Korean people of course. I have met some amazing Korean people. I am just feeling really isolated. Why the hell am I putting this on a public space? I don’t know but it makes me deal with whatever it is I…